20th April Lan: An online cowboys perspective

[The Communist]

I woke up at 5am on a freezing Sunday morning in anticipation of what is the Holy Grail to the CSS community – The lan. After waiting roughly an hour for a train to come, I finally got on the train to the city. I then entered the bunker, where I could hear cries of ‘Laterz!’ and ‘Noob’ emanating below. I felt at home immediately.

After quickly catching up with Sproose and gumbie, I met up with Jabz and waited for our team to arrive…and waited…and waited. Koin and killtacular only tunred up roughly an hour late, but it seemed our team wasn’t the only ones experiencing problems. Half of the teams had only half their players. Covex and FG got off to an early start on nuke, and unfortunately an early finish, as FG got snapped 16-1.

After Koin and Kill arrived, we had 4 players and had to war covex, who were getting pretty impatient. So we ‘recruited’ a 7 year old kid to play for us, who was almost as bad as killtacular. The knife went well, with Beeno giving the side choice to us by headshotting me with an ak halfway through the knife (god bless auto pickup). After that, it was time for this online cowboy to step up to the plate and perform large at the lan.

We lost 16-4.

Personally, I blame the oppressive capitalist government. In reality, we got smashed because it was our first match, we had an 8 year old playing who donated the first 13 rounds, and, of course, covex went large.

After that match, we were all frantically spamming our friends list yelling at various people to come to lan or die. Our threats were not working unfortunately. Luckily for us, Muggie turned up with his girlfriend randomly, and then ditched her to play for us. He later got a text saying ‘they needed to talk’. He took one for the team, that’s for sure. He proceeded to anchor the rest of the wars though, but STILL.

Next war was against our arch nemesis, FG*@#@)_ (or whatever). We were pumped to beat them after getting muggie back on board and were ready to blow up some heads.

We lost 16-5.

Starting to see a trend here? I blame dust 2 and the fact we were all pub randying it up. And the fact no-one watched long as t. However, I got a huge 5 down on t pistol round, which no-one noticed, so maybe it wasn’t that huge after all. After much slitting of wrists, we were really hungry and wanted lunch, but because we were late we had to play the next 3 wars in quick succession before getting our hands on some protein. Slain and Sleek were good games, with some very unlucky situations allowing the online cowboys to pull out large wins. Exalt, however gave us a run for our money, after muggie suicided himself into the enemy on knife round. Gp. A close 16-12 result kept us on our toes.

This means we failed to get in the finals, even though we DESERVED to be in the finals. Well, not really, but we WANTED to be in the finals, which is really the same thing. Covex once again took FG to town, smashing them on both nuke and ferno, with Beeno and f4lse going large.

All in all, it was a mad day, especially as I managed to go the entire day without a [2w] reference.

- Commy

[po0n 4 u]

it alright

[pod0087]

I do like the writing style: biggest slab of text I've read on these forums in a while because of it.

[n00bcake]

Originally Posted by The Communist

I woke up at 5am on a freezing Sunday morning in anticipation of what is the Holy Grail to the CSS community – The lan. After waiting roughly an hour for a train to come, I finally got on the train to the city. I then entered the bunker, where I could hear cries of ‘Laterz!’ and ‘Noob’ emanating below. I felt at home immediately.

After quickly catching up with Sproose and gumbie, I met up with Jabz and waited for our team to arrive…and waited…and waited. Koin and killtacular only tunred up roughly an hour late, but it seemed our team wasn’t the only ones experiencing problems. Half of the teams had only half their players. Covex and FG got off to an early start on nuke, and unfortunately an early finish, as FG got snapped 16-1.

After Koin and Kill arrived, we had 4 players and had to war covex, who were getting pretty impatient. So we ‘recruited’ a 7 year old kid to play for us, who was almost as bad as killtacular. The knife went well, with Beeno giving the side choice to us by headshotting me with an ak halfway through the knife (god bless auto pickup). After that, it was time for this online cowboy to step up to the plate and perform large at the lan.

We lost 16-4.

Personally, I blame the oppressive capitalist government. In reality, we got smashed because it was our first match, we had an 8 year old playing who donated the first 13 rounds, and, of course, covex went large.

After that match, we were all frantically spamming our friends list yelling at various people to come to lan or die. Our threats were not working unfortunately. Luckily for us, Muggie turned up with his girlfriend randomly, and then ditched her to play for us. He later got a text saying ‘they needed to talk’. He took one for the team, that’s for sure. He proceeded to anchor the rest of the wars though, but STILL.

Next war was against our arch nemesis, FG*@#@)_ (or whatever). We were pumped to beat them after getting muggie back on board and were ready to blow up some heads.

We lost 16-5.

Starting to see a trend here? I blame dust 2 and the fact we were all pub randying it up. And the fact no-one watched long as t. However, I got a huge 5 down on t pistol round, which no-one noticed, so maybe it wasn’t that huge after all. After much slitting of wrists, we were really hungry and wanted lunch, but because we were late we had to play the next 3 wars in quick succession before getting our hands on some protein. Slain and Sleek were good games, with some very unlucky situations allowing the online cowboys to pull out large wins. Exalt, however gave us a run for our money, after muggie suicided himself into the enemy on knife round. Gp. A close 16-12 result kept us on our toes.

This means we failed to get in the finals, even though we DESERVED to be in the finals. Well, not really, but we WANTED to be in the finals, which is really the same thing. Covex once again took FG to town, smashing them on both nuke and ferno, with Beeno and f4lse going large.

All in all, it was a mad day, especially as I managed to go the entire day without a [2w] reference.

- Commy

Commy[2w]

[Shmo0]

NO BEAT ME TO IT
delete

[slyK]

commy [2w]

[zaM]

commy [2w]

(sorry i wasn't there to molest you today, i let you down )

[KoiN]

20mins late is hardly an hour lol...

Maybe if you had stayed up till 1 playing poker, smoking and drinking. Then picking up kilta from an urban maze of houses. You might be late too.

Was an alright day. Maybe next lan we should actually prac

GG Covex. Played well.

[The Communist]

Originally Posted by zaM

commy [2w]

(sorry i wasn't there to molest you today, i let you down )

You did let me down...I had to wank off in the toilets instead of getting you to do it for me.

[DrP3cker]

Haha funny write up commy.

[zaM]

Originally Posted by The Communist

You did let me down...I had to wank off in the toilets instead of getting you to do it for me.

OohhHHhhhh LawwWWdDdzzZ

now you've made me [2w]

[carter]

hahaha commy great writeup.
However, I'm shocked to say the least to see no mention of me and peter (emanuel) taking you under our wing at the train station, giving you joy and company as you traveled to and from the bunker.

[Killtacular!]

nice write up commy, lol.

hahahaha. kris and i got there at 8.50am wtf??? lol

you ****ing ****.

[The Communist]

Originally Posted by carter

hahaha commy great writeup however, I'm shocked to say the least to see no mention of me and peter (emanuel) taking you under our wing at the train station, giving you joy and company as you traveled to and from the bunker.

I didn't want Zam to get jealous. You had to go and spill the beans, didn't ya...